Monday, May 31, 2010

Still reading and taking notes from The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Workbook and writing down affirmations for myself. Will see if this works in regards to being more positive about oneself and others. The key is zen like, to be in the moment and stay in that moment without judgment. We/I tend to make judgments about myself or others which can lead to overwhelming emotions.

I wrote 5 poems the other day. My envy of people with positions and summers off lessens when I write because I realize working these hours at 7-11 is getting me out meeting a public I really don't see in academic circles, the working poor.

Well, that's not entirely true in that I'm exhausted and do wish for a less stressful, less physically exhausting position. We'll see what happens. But the position I'm in, lowly clerk, has its odd advantages in terms of writing.

Some of the affirmations and coping strategies listed are as follows from the DBT book:

This is an opportunity for me to learn how to cope with my fears.
I love myself.
I radically accept myself.
I can think different thoughts if I want to.
I'm good and nobody's perfect.
Judgments can trigger overwhelming emotions and lead to disappointment and suffering.
I'm good and nobody's perfect.
This too shall pass.

I have these posted all over the apartment.


"He who realizes the Essence of Mind within himself
Knows that the 'True Mind' is to be sought apart from phenomena
Where is Reality to be found, when all phenomena are unreal?"

The Sutra of Hui Neng--

From 365 Buddha. Jeff Schmidt. Tarcher Putman. 2002.

That said, is hunger mere phenomena? I don't know. It seems that's pretty real, yet our thoughts, these things are phenomena, right? I don't know enough about the quote above, but I find it quite compelling. Our thoughts are indeed mirages. One of the other affirmations/coping quotes I have is:

I can think different thoughts if I want to.

Sometimes I don't want to think differently though. I want to stay stuck for some reason in judgment. I wonder what the root of such judgment is, and I mean judgment of ourselves as well as others. How do we overcome such judgments? Everything according to these books says the key is to practice mindful meditation, and let me tell you, it's not so easy if you have ADHD. But it can be done I think. People can change.

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